Hello! Welcome to Wondering Mother.

I’m Gabi, I’m 36 years old and at first-time mum to Ruby Jean. Since discovering I was pregnant in November 2015 I’ve found life to be utterly bizarre, often alienating and feel a seismic shift in just about everything as I know it.

I’ve started this blog for many reasons, all of which will probably change as my road trip through motherhood wends it’s way, but primarily as right now I feel the need to be connected to other mothers out there who may be wondering what it’s all about and a refusal to believe that it is only I who wonders whether I’ll ever really know what the hell I’m supposed to be doing. 

I have no deluded aspirations that I can be anything other than honest. I’m not an editor, or a writer, or any kind of authority on anything really but I think that’s ok. I’m not wealthy, nor particularly hard up. I’m divorced. That was tough. I rent a house with my boyfriend just outside London. We’re good. It’s not all rainbows and butterflies but we’re alright and trying to make a good life and give it a bloody good shot. I’ve worked hard for 17 years but towards what, I’ve never really known. I have enough, I want more. I have a good family, they drive me mad. I think I’m quite normal really.

My pregnancy was certainly a ‘surprise’. A natural I am not. I had no idea what ‘the third stage’ was (sounds horrific), that pregnancy would feel like it lasts an eternal lifetime nor that there is a plug keeping everything in place. For now. What? Really? Did you know about this before you were pregnant?

No idea. But my God is it exciting. And terrifying. 

And so I have birthed Wondering Mother as a place to unite all of us who are approaching, mastering or most likely winging our way through this mum thing. You are all winging it, right? With you, I’d like to create a collaborative collection of stories about real-life battles and triumphs, heartbreaks and breakthroughs.

I imagine Wondering Mother to be like my front room. With friends, baggy bottomed joggers and no bras. With wine, crisps and no shame. 

It’s where we’ll go to (over)share, to (try to) help and to hopefully reassure each other that we are indeed still kind of sane.

To rant and vent and laugh so much you might wee a little bit and be so brutally honest that your eye’s will water.

It’s basically a real-time, warts and all record of my journey which I hope to collide with your journeys and create something that’s either (probably) a total shitstorm or some kind of semi-sane sounding board. We’ll see…

Whip off that bra and come on in!